Sunday, September 13, 2009
Thursday, September 10, 2009
Embracing
I've had a good morning. I got my son off to school. I then went on 30 minute bike ride. I then enjoyed sitting in my backyard for about an hour. It feels so good to have the sun shine on you for awhile. I was reading my bible and a verse caught my eye. Romans 8:6 : ....simply embrace what the spirit is doing in us..." Those are words to live by. It touched me and I realize by living by His spirit I'm free to be me. Just rambling thoughts this morning. I'm off to my workshop to finish up a few things before I post some of my latest projects.
Thursday, September 3, 2009
My Tattered Life
People that are new to my blog are going to wondering what all these decorating stuff is. Well, I am refurbisher (if that's a word) of sorts. A few years ago I found out I had Fibro. It is a challenge everyday. I realize after having this blog for 6 months that I want to write about my life. Home decor is an aspect of my life, but it is not all of it.
I'm a wife to a great husband. Married 18 years. I have a beautiful son that we adopted almost 7 years ago. Who just started 1st grade and I didn't think I could make it through the day without him. Our son is a beautiful brown and we are white parents raising him. There are issues that come on occasion about this. I've noticed lately that Grady gets a lot "Oh, tha's your mom? Why is she white and you are brown?" In my heart I cringe for him. Having to explain his family identity over and over again. I can tell it can be hard on him at times. Sometimes as an adoptive Mom I wonder am a doing enough for him? I know I can't know what it like to be African American.
The one thing I do know is God changed my life when Fibro came into my life. For the first year I relied on him completely. Not me controlling it. Oh not that I didn't want too! You see I had no control over it. I realized that the control I have in life is all but an illusion. I think it makes me feel better to think I have control over something even when I don't.
It is such invisible disease. No one can see it which there are moments that I think jeez I like for one moment to look like I feel. At times when people say oh you look great. I want to say back "I know how to apply make up." I actually have said that a few times. It doesn't go over that well. I've gained about 40lbs since this all started, I'm stiff and sore. Tired like I've never been before. People really don't want a list of ailments either. They start to get the glazed over look at number 3. I really wanted you to say your fine. Fine isn't in my vocabulary anymore. I have to remind myself on tough days God is in control. It's better that He is in control than I. I have tendency to screw things up.
You know God is a refurbisher too. He takes us and makes us new. I think I'd better just stop there!
I'm a wife to a great husband. Married 18 years. I have a beautiful son that we adopted almost 7 years ago. Who just started 1st grade and I didn't think I could make it through the day without him. Our son is a beautiful brown and we are white parents raising him. There are issues that come on occasion about this. I've noticed lately that Grady gets a lot "Oh, tha's your mom? Why is she white and you are brown?" In my heart I cringe for him. Having to explain his family identity over and over again. I can tell it can be hard on him at times. Sometimes as an adoptive Mom I wonder am a doing enough for him? I know I can't know what it like to be African American.
The one thing I do know is God changed my life when Fibro came into my life. For the first year I relied on him completely. Not me controlling it. Oh not that I didn't want too! You see I had no control over it. I realized that the control I have in life is all but an illusion. I think it makes me feel better to think I have control over something even when I don't.
It is such invisible disease. No one can see it which there are moments that I think jeez I like for one moment to look like I feel. At times when people say oh you look great. I want to say back "I know how to apply make up." I actually have said that a few times. It doesn't go over that well. I've gained about 40lbs since this all started, I'm stiff and sore. Tired like I've never been before. People really don't want a list of ailments either. They start to get the glazed over look at number 3. I really wanted you to say your fine. Fine isn't in my vocabulary anymore. I have to remind myself on tough days God is in control. It's better that He is in control than I. I have tendency to screw things up.
You know God is a refurbisher too. He takes us and makes us new. I think I'd better just stop there!
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